the facts are these

me: He's a short, scrawny, probably undersexed nerd with hilarrble hair and ironic raps.
I was a goner.
Nicholas: Just to recap the plan: Fly to LA, go to the club internet friend reported meeting him once, wait there for the man of your dreams, stage a chance encounter if he patrons the establishment whilst you are in LA, fall madly in love and live happily ever more?
me: Totally. And then he will make me a foam.

I'm starting to think I should not have turned on the Top Chef season two marathon at this point in the season. I turned it on in time to see the deadly sins challenge and Ilan saying that Marcel can't properly cook for lust because he's never had any sex. And all I want to do is set fire to my television. So rude. So unprofessional. I can't believe anyone as unprofessional as that fucking WON Top Chef. I understand that the food is the number one component, but in season one they even said that being a good leader was part of being Top Chef and then we get to season two and it's just a mess, a huge, huge mess.

EDIT: AWWW, Marcel's rap.